Last month I wrote about how I was attempting National Novel Writing Month again and guess what?
I WON!
I wrote more than 50,000 words in 30 days. Each day I dropped the kids off at school, went for a run, took a shower, and sat down at my desk to write. On the weekends I squeezed in a few minutes here and there when I could.
If you were a fly on the wall during these sessions you would have thought I’d gone mad as I mostly paced the room talking to myself.
What I have now is 50,000 words of raw emotion. I grabbed lines from journal prompts and old essays and put them in places that sort of, kind of, made sense. I played with structure and I can see a small outline of the story as is starts to take shape.
November is also the anniversary month of Aiden’s death. I always write about him, but this month I was tackling some particularly difficult scenes and emotions that I hadn’t explored before. Halfway through the month I found myself in a puddle of tears.
I spent the second half of the month doing what I call research. Rather than write all new stuff I simply re-read everything I wrote in the last two years and pulled out the lines and ideas that spoke to me.
I wouldn’t say what I ended up with is a first draft or even an outline; it’s more like a puzzle was just dumped out on to the table and now I have to figure out what goes where.
I want to diminish my accomplishment and say what I wrote is just a bunch of prompt responses and bits and pieces of old essays and therefore I cheated and will never write anything any would want to read… Ever.
I’m not going to do that. Elizabeth Gilbert would be ashamed I’d even entertained the thought.
I put in the work and got it done. AND I polished off an essay I really like that will be published in a pretty big place soon!
I think more than anything this project was an exercise in learning how I write best.
I learned that I need to go for a run and shower before I write. I learned that trying to write while hungry is a bad idea. I learned that my max time with my butt in the chair is about 45 minutes. I learned I have to toggle between writing on a specific topic and working off a prompt. I learned that polishing a personal essay while working on a larger project is like fuel for more ideas. I learned that reading memoirs and personal essays while writing my memoir helps to motivate me. I learned that sometimes I need a break from words and it’s ok to watch The Challenge on MTV and eat my kid’s Halloween candy.
This is where I am today. Thank you for listening.
